There is a giveaway at CityMama for the most embarrassing work out story. I wouldn't normally share something so horribly embarrassing, but there is a Wii Fit at stake, and I'm willing to risk it. Besides, this is soooo mortifying, that it has a good chance of winning. Unless of course they pick randomly and then I've gone and put egg on my face for no good reason. Except your entertainment. When you are done here, go to CityMama, the hostess of this giveaway, and read more entries. Thanks!
A warning to the male readers of this blog: You may want to go here now.
So I'm in this "Yoga-works" class at my gym. It's kind of an odd mix of yoga, strength training and cardio work. It's pretty cool, but also pretty intense. Lots and lots and lots of ab work.
During this session of class, I was, sadly, enduring a visit from our dear "Aunt Flo". And as such I was using the standard internal protection. Things were going along pretty well until we get to the ab work section. We were doing all kinds of things on the balance balls, and with the balance balls and really using those lower ab muscles to the hilt.
We got to this one pose where we had to squeeze and hold it.
And hold it.
And hold it.
And release.
And out the tampon squirted.
I was wearing loose yoga pants that day, so I was able to get to the restroom before too many people saw the blood running down my leg. But a few people did, mostly guys, and I just wanted to have the floor open up on me and swallow me up.
I think I stayed in the restroom for a good 20 minutes before I got the courage to go out there again.
So there you go. My entry into the competition. I hope it earns me what I'm looking for: an excuse not to show my face there again. :)
Today's Hump Day Hmmm: Walking out of stride---how do you walk out of stride, or do you? What's it mean to you? For more takes on this topic, visit Julie at Using My Words. Oh, and if you can complete the title, you get a gold star for today. :)
Ministry of Silly Walks, Monty Python. Go ahead and watch, it's a short clip.
Walking out of stride
This is how I live my life.
Slightly off center.
Never like others.
March to a different drum.
Sometimes really hurts.
I don't understand
What drives so many others.
They all think I'm odd.
It's not that I'm odd
Or even that different.
Same hole, bigger peg.
Over time I learned
How to make my steps fall in
And yet keep them mine.
This was hard to do.
Many tears along the way.
Worth it in the end.
Look at all the strides
You see around you each day.
Each one is unique.
Maybe you can find
A stride different from yours
And ask it to dance.
No, really. I mean it this time. Things got a little crazy there for a bit and I totally had to go into firefighter mode. Things have settled down a bit (even caught up on the laundry!) and I can think again. Thanks for being patient. :)
After the last round of suggestions, it looked like people were most interested in The Last Lecture, by Randy Pausch. This I know is easily available, unlike the last book. It is also pretty short, which means we can schedule the discussion pretty soon.
So, to sum up....
The Last Lecture, Pausch/Zaslow
Sunday, June 1, 8:00 pm CST.
Hope to "see" you there! I'll make cookies. :)
but if I did, that would be the title of this post.
So as my two loyal readers know, I substitute teach. That's part of the reason I haven't been posting as much lately because I can't stay up too late to look at blogs and I can't write posts first thing in the morning like I used to. At least not every day. And since there are only 15 and a half days left of school, and two vacations I want to take this summer, I am trying to work as much as I possibly can.
Anyway, before I tell you why the primal scream, I need to update you on some goings on in the household or the rest of this will make less sense than usual.
Spouse and I, after much gnashing of teeth and renting of clothes, have decided to transfer the Things to another school. The new school uses the IB (International Baccalaureate) Primary Years Curriculum. It's still in our district and not that far from our house (just by the Home Depot I like to haunt...how expensive do you think THAT will be long term?). It has a much smaller student body and I think that overall it is the right decision. Part of my reasoning for moving the soon to be fifth grader was because the fifth grade team at the current school is a mess and will be having 75% turnover next year. And the ones staying don't exactly inspire me.
Today I subbed in the fifth grade and I was subbing for one of the math/science teachers. Today's project was pretty cool: we were starting to build model rockets. This is something I could actually contribute on since I have built them with the Things in the past. They were your standard issue Estes rockets, nothing really fancy. All you have to do is follow the directions and you are fine.
So did we do that? No. She had her OWN directions to follow, ones that are going to make things difficult a bit later. But whatever, I'm just the sub right? So I helped out just kept my mouth shut. During the afternoon time, the third m/s teacher comes into our lab and tells us she's uncomfortable with "all this technical stuff" and could someone help her out. Since the teacher I was subbing for was actually there (she had to administer a TAKS retest in Spanish today and the student finished early), I was sent down to this other teacher's room and I taught the lesson. A totally unprepared sub was better at teaching this lesson than the science teacher.
While in there, this teacher admitted to me that science makes her uncomfortable and had done no prep work for this topic at all.
A science teacher. Uncomfortable with her subject. And this is one of the ones who is STAYING.
Hence the primal scream. And Spouse, since I know you are reading this, TOTAL justification for our decision.
Mother's Day on Sunday.
I like homemade gifts from kids.
Can't wait to see them.
That will end so soon.
They are growing up so fast.
I will miss that stuff.
I will take the time
Treasure what they give me.
'Cause it's from the heart.
But the truth be told?
They've already given me
The best gift: themselves.
Hope you all have a great Mother's Day! For more Haiku, check out these cool Mothers: A Mommy Story and Playgroups are No Place for Children.
So what's this all about?
